“Independence Day: Resurgence”
Directed by Roland Emmerich

I know I’m prone to hyperbole, but this is, quite possibly, the worst written film of the decade. Apparently FIVE credited writers couldn’t come up with ONE LINE remotely real sounding. Never has two plus hours been filled exclusively with fifty-year-old sci-fi cliches, including such gems as “Let’s kick some alien ass!”, “I just pray we made the right decision!”, and, wait for it, “Don’t die on me”! Truly, the worst. Go ahead, I challenge you to come up with something worse. And, before you bring up “San Andreas”, know that as bad as that film was, there was a certain amount of “Showgirls”-esque camp associated with it. In other words, you could laugh your way through that movie.

But this…THIS is terrible AND boring. I’m not sure what Emmerich was thinking, but everything about the direction..pace, suspense, effects…is pure amateur hour. The true achievement is in making so large a budget so dissatisfying to witness. Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. has more believable visual effects, and that show’s visuals are brutal.

And the acting…I just…I mean…what are they DOING?! Pullman is…fine, I guess? But as to what he is doing in the film, your guess is as good as mine. And Goldblum, quite literally, seems to have merely stopped at the studio on the way to the bank. No one else is worth mentioning. Well, okay, Maika Monroe, is attractive and committed in her nonsensical character. And Nikolas Wright gives it a real try. But, the rest…especially Sela Ward, Jessie Usher and Brent Spiner…should give back their Union cards.

There’s an original score, but I seem to have missed it as everything was simply turned to eleven.

You probably weren’t going to go anyway, but just so you’re aware, if your only choice on a 20-hour flight is this film or a two-month-old issue of  Better Homes and Gardens…read the magazine…two or three times. Seriously. As July 4th comes upon us, proclaim your independence…from this film.

Written 07/01/2016